Monthly Archives: March 2011

“you’re just a baby.”

Today, I was called to HR to fill out some paperwork they “missed” on my intake (several years ago). The man who handled the paperwork pulled my information up for me to confirm that it was correct, including my birthdate. He took one look at my birthday and said “woah, 19**, you’re just a baby.” No, I am a fully-grown woman, older than the employees he would be handling in “intake,” with a Master’s degree and a professional career. He then commented that I was the same age as his son. “Is your son a ‘baby’?” I asked. He responded that no, he guessed not, he’s married and has a child (so, no, I’m not abnormally young).

Would he have said the same thing to a man? Called him a baby in a cube farm with other employees milling about within earshot? Does he consider this “baby” to be an educated and competent professional? The sad thing is, I get this all the time, from men who are sometimes only a few years older than me. Sometimes these men make these remarks at times when I’m telling them what to do in a professional capacity. I’ve even been in situations where a younger, subordinate male colleague will be called “sir” and me “hon.” All a part of not taking women seriously.

Submitted by Dax

Location: Work, Federal Agency

Time of harassment: Day Time (9:30A-3:30P)

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“what the hell?!!”

Photo by Daquella manera via flickr

About 5 years ago I was leaving a bar in Adams Morgan with a couple of female coworkers. We had a few drinks and were dancing then decided to go to another bar just a block or two away. Admittedly, Adams Morgan is a breeding ground for college-aged or just out of college ex-frat boys but I was with a group of 5 other girls and it wasn’t that late (around 10 pm or so). As we walked along the sidewalk there was a group of about 5 guys who we passed. One of these jerks not just grabbed but also forcefully slapped my butt.

You never know how you’re going to react but my gut reaction was to very loudly yell “what the hell?!!” at this group. They all acted like they didn’t know what happened so I walked back towards them and said “one of you assholes just grabbed my ass”. There was a little back and forth then finally, the guy who did it sort of popped up behind his friends (he was literally hiding behind theM) and sort of put his hands up in an “i’m guilty” way. I told him to go fuck himself and walked to catch up with my friends.

The kicker was when we got to the next bar and were waiting in line to get in, and as I’m still fuming but proud that I stood up to that asshole, a guy comes up and asks if I’m ok, that he saw that something was going on. I told him the story and he stared at me rather blankly. I rather sarcastically told him that while that may seem like a regular occurance/ok thing to do, it’s definitely not. He sort of shrugged and walked away. Ugh. I know to at least always be vocal if someone violates you, as long as you feel that the person won’t try to hurt or violate you further.

Submitted by K

Location:Adams Morgan

Time of harassment: Night (7:30P-12A)

Do you have a personal experience with gender-based public sexual harassment or assault you would like to submit? Just click here and fill out the online submission form. All submissions are posted anonymously unless you specify.

Alert: Repeat Harasser Rubbing Himself Against Women on Metro

I wanted an outlet to reach out to warn other Metro riders about a repeat Metro experience where the same man was rubbing himself against young women.

I’ve encountered him twice now.

Both times he boarded the Yellow Line toward Huntington at L’Enfant station and gets on the last car.

He gets off at the Pentagon.

This happens between 4:00 and 5:00 in the afternoon.

He will stand behind young women and press up against them closely with his hips, pretending train is too crowded.

The first time I encountered him, it happened to me only, but today I saw him do it to one girl, then when she pushed him off he moved through the car to another woman.

The man is an African American male in his 20s or 30s. He is about 5’10” with a slender build. He has close-cropped hair.

Both times, I’ve seen him wearing a track suit made of thin material. On March 18, it was black with lime green shoulders. He wore a white watch on his left wrist, and Ralph Lauren glasses that had heavy black frames with clear lenses.

If you do encounter him, I advise you to confront the man by looking him square in the face and asking him to back off and give them some space. Based on my experience, he will move on.

I called the Metro police and gave a description. You should, too, if you are a victim.

Submitted by anonymous

Location: L’Enfant Plaza

Time of harassment: Evening Rush Hour (3:30P-7:30P)

Do you have a personal experience with gender-based public sexual harassment or assault you would like to submit? Just click here and fill out the online submission form. All submissions are posted anonymously unless you specify.

“Damn look at that ass.”

As I was walking home from class i walked past a man who very obviously looked like a tourist because he was filming the street as he walked saying everything he was walking by. Many people who passed him were holding back chuckles at his approach to documenting his trip. I walked past him and about ten steps later I heard him say “Damn, look at that ass”. I wasn’t sure if that was directed at me or if I even heard correctly but when I looked back over my shoulder his camera was pointed right at me and he quickly broke his stare in my direction to look elsewhere (but keeping his camera on focus). It was really uncomfortable to know that someone said that and that they had it on tape. I just kept walking faster to get away.

Submitted by anonymous on 3/21/2011

Location: Pennsylvania and 24th

Time of harassment: Evening Rush Hour (3:30P-7:30P)

Do you have a personal experience with gender-based public sexual harassment or assault you would like to submit? Just click here and fill out the online submission form. All submissions are posted anonymously unless you specify.

“Then lifted his sweatshirt to expose himself.”

I was heading east on S Street, half a block away from 18th Street, when a tall, mid-30s Caucasian man wearing a big sweatshirt and jeans approached me. He asked me if I could give him a hand with something, and then lifted up his sweatshirt to reveal himself exposed. I ran to the other side of the street, and when I looked back at him he was running south on 18th Street. I called the police and filed a report.

Submitted by anonymous on 3/20/2011

Location: 18th and S NW

Time of harassment: Morning Rush Hour (5A-9:30A)

Do you have a personal experience with gender-based public sexual harassment or assault you would like to submit? Just click here and fill out the online submission form. All submissions are posted anonymously unless you specify.

Repeat Metro Harasser

I recently started taking the Metro to work. There’s a guy who hands out the Metro papers near the entrance. There’s a long approach to the gates, so he has a long time to talk, if he wants.

Usually, he says good morning, I say good morning. He offers me a paper, I say no thanks and he says “Have a blessed day” as I walk into the station. On Friday, I could have sworn he whispered “sexy, sexy” after that.

I wasn’t sure, so I didn’t say anything. But it bothered me all weekend, so today, when he did it again, I stopped, turned around and walked back. And I said “I hear you talking about women under your breath, they don’t appreciate it and I don’t appreciate it.” He objected, saying “who do you hear me talking about?” Since I didn’t want to be called a fat bitch, I didn’t say it was me, I just said please stop.

I feel better having said something today. But I’m going to have to walk past this man every morning. So what’s he going to say tomorrow?

Submitted by anonymous on 3/21/2011

Location: Fort Totten Metro Stop

Time of harassment: Morning Rush Hour (5A-9:30A)

Do you have a personal experience with gender-based public sexual harassment or assault you would like to submit? Just click here and fill out the online submission form. All submissions are posted anonymously unless you specify.

“you’ve got pretty legs”

Photo by bettyx1138

I was walking down 14th St coming home from work and as this guy passed me he looks me up and down and says “you’ve got pretty legs” in a leery, sing-songy way.

Wasn’t expecting to hear that one – I have a big bruise/scab on one of my knees from a fall I had last week. This morning I debated wearing a dress without tights because of the state of my knee, but it was just so warm out that I skipped them. The dress is knee length, business appropriate and I was wearing a windbreaker type jacket and flip flops for the walk home. Not my finest hour.

At any rate, I definitely did not take it as a compliment, and the comment did not make me feel better about my appearance. It just made my skin crawl. It’s bad enough when men leer, but it’s way worse when they actually say what they’re thinking in that moment.

Submitted by ms on 3/18/2011

Location: 14th & Harvard St. NW

Time of harassment: Evening Rush Hour (3:30P-7:30P)

Do you have a personal experience with gender-based public sexual harassment or assault you would like to submit? Just click here and fill out the online submission form. All submissions are posted anonymously unless you specify.